Chuck Norris "Facts"

[Dark Mousy]

Anyone have any good Chuck Norris "Facts"?

I have a few good ones but i'm wondering if anyone else has some really funny ones.

Here are my Chuck Norris "Facts":

Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.

There's no global warming, Chuck Norris was just cold so he turned up The Sun.

You know how some people wear Superman pajamas? Well Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.

There's no theory of evolution, just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

Chuck Norris’s hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.

[BananaMuffin]

This was very funny.